Thursday, April 23, 2009

Please don't torment your children...

So I think most people who read this know that I work in a high volume pediatric clinic. We see all kinds of kids for all kinds of different issues.

One thing that never changes is the obscene names that some people pick out for their kids. I don't know why they would want to permanently damage their child's future possibility of running for president or being awarded the nobel peace prize, but they continue too.

It got so bad that we have started remembering the worst names. We have collectively remembered close to 100 ridiculous names since I have been here....not to mention the 1000s of others that we have yet to see in the clinic . I thought since I've been a little MIA this week with posting that I can share some actual names that have been seen in our clinic!

Here ya go...

Jonbonjovi (this was all one word I kid you NOT)
Nice Hairy Colon (To protect the privacy of this patient, it was a name that sounded like NiceHairy and her last name was Colon....pretty neat huh)
Champagne (still not kidding)
Cashamona (cash money)
Spawntanious (apparently the name wasn't)
Dyamond Rubi
Alukard (Drakula backwards)
Kal el (this is apparently Superman's name on his home planet)

I think one of my most frustrating times as a child was when I could never find my name on one of those touristy keychains, pens, magnets, etc. Since it was spelled k-e-l-l-E-y, they never had mine. These poor kids will share my fate....and sadly their middle names weren't any better.

Have you all seen any ridiculous baby names?


Brittney Galloway said...

I love it! Yeah there are some crazy names out there right now. Our music minister at our church just named his baby girl "florence," which isn't Horrible, but they are calling her Floe, (like chloe,) which I think is pretty bad!

Aaron Wagner said...

A black girl: Shithead (pronounced shith-aed)

Susanne, Chris and Kate said...

All I can say is Wow!

I feel your pain as a child, Kelley. All I could find were Sue, Susan or Suzanne.

Cyndi said...

A new one I saw yesterday was Jacey Lazyboy.